Soy grilla, y qué?

If you don't know what a grilla is, well a pictures worth a thousand words.

That's right, a grilla is a cricket.  Or if you like a little humor in your explanations, then:

Una grilla es la esposa de un grillo
A female cricket is the wife of a male cricket

While that's really funny, it's not the definition we're looking for.  We're going to talk about what this word means in Colombia, where it can take on an entirely meaning.

First things first.  The term grilla applies to a woman, and not in a very nice way.   In fact, there are several definitions of what a grilla is in Colombia, so with that said, let's get to it and find out exactly what a grilla is. 

The simplest definition of a grilla is una fea (an unattractive woman).

A grilla could also refer to a woman who comes from a lower income neighborhood, is very promiscuous,  and has little class or education.  For those of you who understand the term, "hoodrat" seems to be an equivalent English word.

The term grilla can also apply to any woman who likes to "show off her goods".  In other words, her wardrobe leaves nothing (or very little) to the imagination.  A very provocative dresser.  

Grilla also applies to a woman who never turns down an invitation from a guy to go out to eat or party.  And of course he's paying the bill.  To make things worse, she may also invite her friends, at his expense of course.  And guys, if you haven't figured this out yet, she has zero interest in you, you're just a wallet to her.

Here's a video that does a great job of explaining this definition of grilla.  It's in Spanish, but if you're still fine tuning those Spanish ears, don't worry, it has English subtitles.  It's only 2:33 long, and personally, I got a good laugh out of it.

The video is below, but if for some reason you don't see it here's the link:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RVsPoJDyTK4

And that brings to the final definition of grilla, a woman who's sole motive is to find a man to maintain her. 

Married or single, as long as he can keep money in her bank account, pay her bills, drive her around in a nice car, give her credit or debit cards, take her out on dates, she's a happy woman.   I think the English word that applies here is gold digger.  

So I think by now you should have a pretty good idea of what grilla means in Colombia.   And just so you know, those definitions are not mutually exclusive.  A woman could fit several of them.

As for the origin of the word grilla, the terms popularity came from it's use in the telenovela El Cartel de Los Sapos.  At least that's what I've read. 

Let's look at a few more related terms before we wrap things up.

Remember the poor guy that had to pay for a night with la grilla and her friends that I mentioned above?  Well, that guy is called a marrano, and in standard Spanish it means pig.

Here's another fun video, but this it's about marranos.  If you don't see the video below, here's the direct link:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LZIvBgAtkmY

Hopefully you got a laugh out of the video.  I certainly did, but then again I've watched that scene play out on numerous occasions so I can identify.  Luckily I was never a marrano.

A grillera would be a woman that likes to date unattractive men.

A grillero is a guy who likes to pick up or date grillas, and in this case I'm primarily referring to the definition of a grilla being an unattractive woman.   Although it also includes women looking to be wined and dined by a marrano sapiens. 

If you didn't watch the second video, a marrano sapiens is a guy who knows he's a marrano, but he also knows he's going to get a full return on his investment at the end of the night.  I'm going to guess you can figure out what I mean by that.

Let's move on to the last thing.

There are men who find the idea of dating grillas agreeable, no matter what type of grilla she is.  But ¿Quién soy yo para juzgar? The act of dating grillas is called grillar.  Apparently this happens often enough to have it's own verb.

And that's it.  Guys, don't say I didn't warn you!